It’s the
first of the year and I’m going to lose weight
so I’ll
bounce out of bed when I wake.
I shall
weigh all the food that I put on my plate
when I’ve
had just one more slice of cake.
It’s the
first of the year and I’m planning to write
in a diary
backed with gold foil.
I have
filled up my pen, but the page is so bright
I’m afraid
it is too nice to spoil.
It’s the
first of the year and I’m joining the gym;
I shall
tone up from tiptoes to crown.
I shall
stretch and lift weights and become fit and slim,
but first I
shall have a sit down.
It’s the
first of the year and I’m giving up booze
since last
night, when I fell on the cat.
I’ll try to
be sober. Can I be excused
to lift two
or three glasses to that?
