Tuesday, May 28, 2013

One for the Holidays

Another bit of whimsy. Yes, I have cupboards full of this stuff. Where do you think Nora Forthright gets it from?


Woman exposed to pollen in £1M compensation claim

Emily Sneezedown, 34, is suing Strangleweed Farm for £1 million for failing to notify the public that the fields surrounding her bungalow contained pollen-producing grass, cereals and hedges. In a civil action in the High Court, Ms Sneezedown stated that she had recently moved to Primworthy and to reach her place of work and return home she needed to walk past the farm.

“I am a martyr to hayfever,” she told the court, through a barricade of paper tissues. “I moved into the bungalow in the winter of 2004. The following summer was a nightmare. Grass, trees, flowers – I was surrounded by them. It was terrifying. If I had realised the countryside contained so many pollen-producing plants, I would never have moved here.”

The authority of Mr Justice Broompaddock, presiding, was initially challenged by the Defence on account of his known support for the charity Hayfever Research, of which he is a Vice-President. “I am also a gardener,” he said, showing the court a photograph of his gravel driveway. Legal advisers to Strangleweed Farms agreed that this was a typical example of Primworthy’s local horticulture and did not press further for him to step down.

A spokesman for the Health and Safety Executive, who investigated the case last year, said the HSE had found no case to answer. “There is no law compelling farmers to warn people that their land grows grass,” he said. “We should however advise people that such fields may also contain animals.”

The case is expected to continue for most of next year.


REMINDER - THIS IS FICTION. Most people will realise that, but having read some very odd comments recently on blogs and on FB... you never can tell.

~~ THE FORTHRIGHT SAGA ~~ Nothing ever happens in an English country town ... does it? Nora Forthright and her grandson Wayne stumble through the fictional Cumbrian towns of Dangleby and Pullet St Mary, putting things right entirely by accident. Cumbrian Humour.
and on Amazon

~~ Dragon Bait ~~ This one's got humour and horses that fly.
Princess Andra volunteers to act as bait for the dragon ravaging her father’s lands, on condition that she is released from an arrangement to marry a foreign prince.
Unfortunately the Knight Rescuer who turns up is not the trusty old retainer she expects, but an unknown conservationist who wants the dragon, not the lady. After that very little goes according to plan.
Comic fantasy (age 9-12).
and on Amazon

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